Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Anger

Refrain from anger, and forsake wrath! Fret not yourself; it tends only to evil.
Psalm 37:7-9

I used to be an angry individual. I'm not saying that I no longer get irrationally angry, but with a lot of work, prayer, support from a patient wife, and some counseling I'm much better than I used to be. With the change that has come I also see anger in others and its effect on their life more clearly. I don't boast in my lack of anger because I know I could very easily be them.

I believe anger to be one of the more destructive emotions when handled improperly. It has creates the same internal damage that worry and despair do, but it has the added bonus of coming out in actions and words which damages other people.

In the last few days I've watched anger in play. Deep anger and worry that comes from wounds I will never fathom. Irrational anger that lashes out and causes chaos and discord whereever it goes. And I think to myself that only by the grace of God am I not that person. I can only pray for peace in these situations and hope that they receive the same peace that has been given to me.

Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty,and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.
Proverbs 16:31-33

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

And now for something completely awesome

Dagnabbit

I hate feeling guilty for not having written here recently or having kept up with either of my podcasts. I haven't touched the guitar in weeks. I've gotten better at managing my time to the point that I'm actually studying web development more. However, that is really the only positive thing I can come up with at the moment. I'll be on vacation for a week and won't be able to do any of this because I'll be in Pennsylvania visiting my in-laws.

C.J. Mahaney has written a good piece on his blog about procrastination and how some of us are more prone than others to lean towards it. I'm definitely a procrastinator. In the past I always felt I did my best work under a deadline. I've been out of the scholastic environment for ten years now, nothing drives me. Sure I have deadlines at work and I have a good habit of meeting or beating them, but once the work is over I'm back to my lazy, self-centered lifestyle. I know deep down inside part of me feels like I deserve a break after 5:00, but a lack of diligence outside the office has put me in a precarious position. I have to "cram" now so I can be prepared to make a job change if necessary. My options are limited because I haven't taken advantage of the opportunities that I have been given.

Outside of that I don't want to be in a corporate environment all of my life. I want to utilize my knowledge of technology to reach out and make a difference in the world. The way I see it though, if I can't take the time for the things I "want" to do on a regular basis then I'm really going to have a hard time with the things I'm called to do as a believer.

I'm not saying I need to be a workaholic, studyholic, evangelholic 24/7/365. That is a road of deception that leads away from God as well. I am saying I need to work, and work hard, to strike a balance.